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Silly Jokes
Tweet Topic Started: Feb 29 2008, 11:32 PM (1,941 Views)
Noname Sep 25 2008, 08:49 PM Post #101
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Glorious Witch
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Auntie Maine
Sep 21 2008, 06:20 PM
A friend sent me this and I thought it was too funny. :clap Oh,and that dress is sooooo so very wrong. :shock

Posted Image

Posted Image

is that the real people, Dan?
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Auntie Maine Sep 26 2008, 12:26 PM Post #102
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Don't know,its just the way the email came to me.
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Rodney Sep 26 2008, 02:28 PM Post #103
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OMG...That dress...OMG...how very very wrong
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Auntie Maine Sep 26 2008, 10:15 PM Post #104
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Yeah,its a pole dancing wedding :shock

My question is ...Did that horrid slag get married in a church?!?!?!
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Auntie Maine Oct 2 2008, 12:40 PM Post #105
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EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY
>
> After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve.
> 'So, how is everything going?' inquired God.
>
> 'It is all so beautiful, God,' she replied. 'The sunrises and
> sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is
> wonderful, but I have just one problem.
>
> It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the
> other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms,
> catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a
> real pain.'
>
> And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body
> came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. She felt that
> having only two breasts might leave her body more 'symmetrically
> balanced'.
>
> 'That's a fair point,' replied God, 'But it was my first shot at
> this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that
> you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will
> fix it up right away.'
>
> And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into
> the bushes
>
> Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of
> Eden.
>
> 'Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?'
>
> 'Just fantastic,' she replied, 'But for one oversight. You see, all
> the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her
> bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone.'
>
> God though for a moment and said, 'You know, Eve, you are right.
> How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will
> immediately create a man from a part of you. Let's see....where did
> I put that useless boob?'
>
> Now doesn't THAT make more sense than all that crap about the rib?



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Julesy Oct 2 2008, 03:01 PM Post #106
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:ha

boys ARE dumb!
:toot

:ha
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Auntie Maine Oct 5 2008, 02:51 AM Post #107
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The Budweiser Frogs...
Posted Image

:barf
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Auntie Maine Oct 5 2008, 02:53 AM Post #108
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I love this one!! :clap

Posted Image
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Noname Oct 5 2008, 08:15 PM Post #109
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:clap
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Julesy Oct 6 2008, 02:55 PM Post #110
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:ha
awwww
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Auntie Maine Oct 6 2008, 07:08 PM Post #111
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I love the pssst one. :chuckle
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Noname Oct 10 2008, 05:05 PM Post #112
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Auntie Maine
Oct 6 2008, 07:08 PM
I love the pssst one. :chuckle

me too
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Julesy Oct 13 2008, 04:58 PM Post #113
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me too. I told that joke at work.
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Noname Oct 13 2008, 06:33 PM Post #114
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What did they say?
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Julesy Oct 21 2008, 01:47 AM Post #115
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they laughed!


A priest is on a boat that starts to sink. Everyone gets on a lifeboat and they invite the priest on the boat. He declines. "God will save me. I don't need a lifeboat." As the ship sinks further, another shipping vessel comes by and offers to rescue the priest. The priest again turns down the offer, "God will save me. I don't need your ship." Finally, as the situation becomes precarious, a helicopter is sent in to take the priest to safety. But again he refuses saying, "God will save me ..."

As the water is about to overtake him, the priest shouts out to God in anger, "My God, why have you forsaken me?"

God replies, "I sent you a boat, a ship and a helicopter. What else did you want me to do?"
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Auntie Maine Oct 23 2008, 08:33 PM Post #116
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:toot HA!
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Noname Oct 25 2008, 06:34 PM Post #117
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Julesy
Oct 21 2008, 01:47 AM
they laughed!


A priest is on a boat that starts to sink. Everyone gets on a lifeboat and they invite the priest on the boat. He declines. "God will save me. I don't need a lifeboat." As the ship sinks further, another shipping vessel comes by and offers to rescue the priest. The priest again turns down the offer, "God will save me. I don't need your ship." Finally, as the situation becomes precarious, a helicopter is sent in to take the priest to safety. But again he refuses saying, "God will save me ..."

As the water is about to overtake him, the priest shouts out to God in anger, "My God, why have you forsaken me?"

God replies, "I sent you a boat, a ship and a helicopter. What else did you want me to do?"
I was just thinking about that joke! I mean I was JUST thinking about it! And then I came on here and there it was! WOW!
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the former misstress candy Oct 29 2008, 04:29 PM Post #118
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auntie u made my eyes water and my face crack from laughing outloud so much.i had to jump on the phone and pass the laughs around..........thanks :wave :partyguy
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Auntie Maine Oct 29 2008, 09:44 PM Post #119
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:curtsy
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Rodney Nov 9 2008, 05:38 PM Post #120
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OH she's a real kidder, our Auntie Maine is...


Question:

Which sexual position causes ugly children?



Answer:



Ask your mum
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