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Can guys and girls be "just friends"?
Tweet Topic Started: Jan 2 2007, 08:48 PM (697 Views)
Noname Jan 3 2007, 06:24 PM Post #21
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True, but we are all diffrent.
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Julesy Jan 3 2007, 06:30 PM Post #22
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sooo you agree straight males and straight females cannot be more than friends,even just for a bit?
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Noname Jan 3 2007, 06:34 PM Post #23
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Then what is friendship I say!?
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Julesy Jan 3 2007, 06:37 PM Post #24
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hahah between the same sex i reckon.
anything else is risky.
You PROBABLY can be friends with someone who is kinda ugly and you hae no slight attaction to....

thats all I can come up with.


Yet they will probably like you.....oi
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Noname Jan 3 2007, 06:39 PM Post #25
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we're weird. yeah!!! :hug
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Julesy Jan 3 2007, 06:40 PM Post #26
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:rocks
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Noname Jan 3 2007, 06:52 PM Post #27
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:cheer
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la anaconda de chocolatee Jan 3 2007, 08:15 PM Post #28
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Julesy
Jan 3 2007, 06:37 PM
hahah between the same sex i reckon.
anything else is risky.
You PROBABLY can be friends with someone who is kinda ugly and you hae no slight attaction to....

thats all I can come up with.


Yet they will probably like you.....oi

yeah but sometimes after knowing a person well for a long time, you might not have been physically attracted to them but after getting to know them via friendship for a long time they start to look appealing to you and you become attracted to them.
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Noname Jan 3 2007, 09:21 PM Post #29
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That's true. I think I a going to have contradict myself. The more I hang around some people the more I start to like them physically. It takes like a week for me to realize that they are just friends and nothing more.
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Julesy Jan 3 2007, 10:53 PM Post #30
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SEE! I SAID ITS IMPOSSIBLE! CAUSE IT IS!!!!
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Hunter Jan 4 2007, 04:13 AM Post #31
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Me lost count the amount of times I have seen couples have wars over this exact topic

Even though most of the time nothin' freakin' happened !!!!!
Its mainly over, cos one of the partners sees the other partners friend as a threat
N' then insecuritites begin
Fights starts
N' it all goes down hill from there

Pleassse, dont attack me for sayin' that !!!!!
From what Ive witnessed n' experienced myself, that is the case, most of the time
Im not sayin' its always the case.

Some people sense the threat n' should be weary of it
But some are too harsh on those that were not goin' to step the mark

Some cases its not that the partner n' friend might get their freak on
Its that the other partner, sees the partners friend highly, or they can tell that their partner sees his/her friend highly.
Then they start comparin' themselves to the friend n' feel they dont match up for some reason and so begins to feel threaten their lover is goin' to get carried off into the sunset by this friend

Lost a so called friend, not long ago, for being with the lovah Im with now
He actually tried talkin' me out of my new relationship and tried his damndest to make me feel awful about it.

This so called friend, admitted he wanted more from me. He has done this to me a few times, but only been truly honest about it recently. I see clearly now he's only my friend, when he thinks he has a chance of being with me.

When Im taken, he acts as if I dont exist. No contact whatsoever.
In the end, he said sorry n' that he is happy for me, always wants to be my friend blah blah, that was months ago
Total silence since then so dont really believe the kind last words, so he said sorry of lyin' with more lies, yeah clever.
Thats no true friend to me.
When he comes back, when he thinks Im single again. Good luck mofo' lol

Ive been accused badly in the past, of sleepin' with a male friend by my partner at the time
Not only did I not do anythin' with mi amigo
There wasnt even any flirtin' goin' on !!!!!
Years on, my amigo and I still have come no where near makin' moves on each other

How I'd love to tell my ex that !!!!!!
But no, I'll be nice n' modest

:angel

It hurt being accused of that n' ooh p*ssed me off like you would not believe
We discussed, ok more like argued the matter to death, but nothin' was gettin' through to my darlin' d*ckhead
So seein' just how poorly he trusted me and how he was so stubbornly unwilling on sortin' it out, was it for me.
I let him go, without a fight. Im not goin' to fight to keep someone that thinks of me that badly

You can just be friends with the opposite sex.
It can work while you're in a relationship, married etc it depends on your partner but not just your partner, you as well.
Your partner n' their friend could live their whole lives not wantin' more than friendship from each other but if you dont believe that, then your relationship wont last.

So yah .....
On the other hand Ive also known a few long time friends turn into couples, some resultin' in a few broken hearts n' nasty betrayals

Ive been cool with my past n' present lovahs friends of the opposite sex
But oooh yah theres been a few I had to watch closely, with good reason.

If Im to start a relationship with someone in the future, who happens to not like a friendship of mine. No, I will not end the friendship for them

But if their ok with the fact that my friend isnt goin' anywhere. I'll respect them in return I wont just push the matter aside.
I'll keep in mind, my partner isnt so great about my friend n' I
Find ways I can prove to my partner, he can trust my friend and I, till my partner is comfortable about it all

Some of my guy pals are quite good lookin', two of them are models.
Noticed the better lookin' my guy pal is, the more some partners, some other friends, sometimes even my own mum and dad find it hard to believe we are only friends. I understand but f*ck it sucks ass when just about everyone believes its more for awhile.

When my guy pals n' I hug, as we say hello or goodbye, by some reactions its like we just had a quickie in front of everyone. Not that the hug was sexual, its cos some have us under a microscope.
Simple things mean far more than they should to them. Like a hug, c'mon !!!!!

So what, cos its a guy friend thats good lookin' that Im huggin', it must mean more ???
I hug all of my friends hello n' goodbye, its not like Im givin' my guy pals special attention.

When Im attracted to someone I dont hide it
Love or lust I dont n' cant hide it lol
Everyone that knows me, should know that about me by now but ehhh I guess not
They think Im hidin' this n' that n' blah blah blah with my dude pals lol I said dude

So I know you can be just friends with the opposite sex, ugly or not
But havin' other people, especially partners trust that its just a friendship is another matter.
That, usually doesnt work.

What some people see in my friendships with some of the guys, that makes them believe its more, I dont know.
All I do know, is we are just friends. So whatever they're pickin' up on is being very misread.

Wow, think this is the longest post Ive done in a long ass while.

:faint
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Julesy Jan 4 2007, 04:38 AM Post #32
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wow! good post Huntah! :clap
I see where ya coming from.

I reckon Im just too cynical now. Being I was friends with my lovah first. I trust noone!

I like the long-ness of this post. :;
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la anaconda de chocolatee Jan 4 2007, 04:45 AM Post #33
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hunter I read the first half of your post then I gave up cause it was too damn long for me! lol
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Hunter Jan 4 2007, 07:10 AM Post #34
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Jan 4 2007, 03:38 PM
I reckon Im just too cynical now. Being I was friends with my lovah first. I trust noone!

Nah, not cynical
Just depends on your experiences ya know, to then depend on how ya see things

:D

Same 'ere Michele. I just went to go make sure I made no typos in my post. Stopped halfway lol
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Atomic Blonde Jan 5 2007, 06:59 PM Post #35
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ALL of my good male friends are gay.


all five of them.


so i cant say hahaha.
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Noname Jan 5 2007, 07:13 PM Post #36
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So, we all agree on this topic? Damn you, Jules. I was all set arguing against you, but then I saw the light.
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Jane Jan 5 2007, 10:29 PM Post #37
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There must be exceptions to the rule though! Maybe it says more about our insecurities with our other halves?? I would hate Rick to have a female friend, even a gay one! That would be weird. I wonder wht straight females and gay males get on so well but it doesn't seem to work with straight men and lesbians!
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Atomic Blonde Jan 5 2007, 11:19 PM Post #38
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Ok so being the dorkwad that I am the MINUTE i read this thread the FIRST thing that popped into my head was from one of my fav movies: When Harry Met Sally

I think Harry explains it all quite succinctly...


Quote:
 
Harry Burns: You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Sally Albright: Why not?
Harry Burns: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Sally Albright: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Harry Burns: No you don't.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: No you don't.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: You only think you do.
Sally Albright: You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Harry Burns: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: How do you know?
Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
Sally Albright: What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?
Harry Burns: Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Sally Albright: Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.
Harry Burns: I guess not.
Sally Albright: That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.
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Atomic Blonde Jan 5 2007, 11:20 PM Post #39
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And 10 years later....

Quote:
 
Harry Burns: Would you like to have dinner?... Just friends.
Sally Albright: I thought you didn't believe men and women could be friends.
Harry Burns: When did I say that?
Sally Albright: On the ride to New York.
Harry Burns: No, no, no, I never said that... Yes, that's right, they can't be friends. Unless both of them are involved with other people, then they can... This is an amendment to the earlier rule. If the two people are in relationships, the pressure of possible involvement is lifted... That doesn't work either, because what happens then is, the person you're involved with can't understand why you need to be friends with the person you're just friends with. Like it means something is missing from the relationship and why do you have to go outside to get it? And when you say "No, no, no it's not true, nothing is missing from the relationship," the person you're involved with then accuses you of being secretly attracted to the person you're just friends with, which you probably are. I mean, come on, who the hell are we kidding, let's face it. Which brings us back to the earlier rule before the amendment, which is men and women can't be friends.
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Atomic Blonde Jan 5 2007, 11:23 PM Post #40
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BUT, I will argue with Harry that in some cases they can be friends if they are truly happy with the person they are with AND they dont find the other person even remotely attractive.

my ex-best friend used to be great friends with zeb, but zeb literally said that he though her face "sorta looks like a horse" and "she looks like an ugly boy with short hair" but they were still friends. so their ya go.
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