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ITT...
Topic Started: Jan 31 2008, 04:58 PM (374 Views)
Robtcee13
I am a fish.
The moment you enter this topic, you die and are taken to hell. It is here where the Grim Reaper will judge you in a conversation. You are alone, and cannot have allies transport in to help you/make the conversation more interesting.

Grim Reaper: Let's see... *Pulls out a piece of paper* Yep. He's next.
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master4sword
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Hail Hydreigon
Admin
"Hey. Mind telling me what I just died of? I wasn't paying attention >_>"

Also, I'll be here with alts soon.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Let's see... Your name is master4sword? Surname? *Pause* Also, what the hell is an alt?
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Maltese, stop lurking and die. >_>
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The Ultramind12
Member Avatar
Fist of the North Star
*Blink* "Huh. That's pretty impressive if you managed to nab me. Wait a tick, you aren't Richard Falcon... WHAT BULLSHITTERY IS THIS? I AM AN IMMORTAL, AND I DESERVE A HIGHER GRADE DEATH THAN THIS."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Let's see... Ooh, The Ultramind, huh? Can't believe you managed to die. What, did you have a... Brain attack? Aheh... Yeah, that wasn't funny. I guess your sense of humor falls apart a bit when you have no social contact and you deal with souls for a living. Dying... Whatever. So, according to this, you're definitely going to... Huh... I can't read this. It looks like Hell, but it might be Heaven.
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Drifting Swordsman
Member Avatar
Screw the rules, I have sporks!
Root Admin
... Goddammit, do I have to Sporkaga Death?
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Ah ha ha. Very funny, Drifting Swordsman. You have no idea how much I hate you. No offense to you personally, but you're one of those damned special cases. You see, given that you're a god, you can live as many lives as you feel you can get away with. God damn special cases.


(Other people, respond to the Grim Reaper pl0x. >_>)
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Drifting Swordsman
Member Avatar
Screw the rules, I have sporks!
Root Admin
None taken. *grabs popcorn* Want some?
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Sure. Wanna help me judge some of these souls? Happen to have any... Friends who're gonna stop by for a visit in hell?
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The Ultramind12
Member Avatar
Fist of the North Star
"Hmm. I'd think I could be sent to neither. Heaven is completely out of the question, and I believe that last time I got dragged into Hell, they kicked me out because they were afraid I would take it over. Purgatory got boring really quickly, so unless it now sports a widescreen TV, a Wii with a Gamecube controller, and Brawl in that Wii, I think I'll just call Shadowlyger or Lynx and have them pick me up."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Great! I'm afraid you'll have to wait for 3000 years for your first phone call or outworld telecommunication first. Purgatory's rules. Although I'm not afraid to play Guitar Hero or Smash Bros once in awhile.
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
"3000 years? Shit, I'll take it. Last time they made we wait OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAND! years."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Unfortunately, we don't quite have Brawl in stock in Hell yet. We might get it in around 20 years. Ah, the hell with it. *Snaps fingers* *Ultramind is locked in an extremely large room containing an extremely large amount of people to kill* Oh, have fun. Once you kill enough to atone for what you have done in life, I'll consider allowing you to move on to another place. You've killed quite a few people in life, right? Well over 100000000000000000000 people, at the very least. Gotta kill double the amount you killed in life.
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
"So... so basically I get to have a massive killing spree? FUCKING AWESOME." *Spams Psionic Storm* Ah, the sweet smell of bloodbaths."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: More or less, but these aren't innocents. They're the souls of your dead allies getting killed over and over again.
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The Ultramind12
Member Avatar
Fist of the North Star
"Meh, never really cared about most of them. I have a SHITLOAD of dead allies. Mostly the kind of, "Use for now, and don't care when they die." If it's Zerg, well they're mindless without me anyway."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Exactly. Now that they're right by you, they've never been more intelligent. Yet, you have no control over them.
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The Ultramind12
Member Avatar
Fist of the North Star
"But... I kinda need to be in control of them for them to have any intelligence. *Psionic Storm* Because the basic concept is that I pass down orders to the cerebrates, the cerebrates pass down the orders to the Overlords, and the Overlords pass down the orders to the troops. Without me, the entire equation kinda falls apart. Okay, granted, Cerebrates, with a strong enough will, can take command in my absence, but all of the cerebrates that have died under my command I never really liked anyway. Which is part of why they died. Annoyingly enough, Daggoth is among the cerebrates who have died... Speaking of which, you realize that with me here, the Zerg are probably rampaging about all of space-time annihilating everything in their way? Oooh, the delicious slaughter."
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Atomic Inferno
Member Avatar
it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Oh. I died.

How sad.

</sarcasm>
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: More souls for me. *Sends multiple souls to hell, and 3 to heaven* Oh, yeah, do I need to mention a bit of Hell technology for ya? Y'see, in addition to having a Wii, at least 4 Xbox 360s, and hundreds of PS3s. Well, of course, PS3s. They're the best system in the world. They might overheat and have bad games, but still. Anyway, we've got technology here known as enslaved Psychics, extremely powerful, you know. They grab some of your intelligence, and order the Zerg, as well as other more human minions you've had in the past, precisely of your weaknesses.
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Atomic Inferno,Jan 31 2008
05:56 PM
Oh. I died.

How sad.

</sarcasm>

>_>
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The Ultramind12
Member Avatar
Fist of the North Star
"But... I don't have any weaknesses... Sans pure, unadulterated Dark Templar energy, and the only guy capable of wielding that is long dead and wasn't MY enemy. In any case, me being a giant brain, I'm 110% certain I'm a far more powerful psychic than anything you've got here." *Psionic Storm* "Cause, you know, it takes an unbelievable amount of concentration to command trillions upon trillions upon BAZILLIONS of Zerg individually. Yeah, I need to give orders to each and every one, hence the filtering system of Cerebrates and Overlords to command progressively smaller legions. I can command each and every Zerg and STILL have enough concentration left over to do a large number of things, because I'm a giant brain and I'm awesome like that. Mere psychics don't have the kind of mental capacity to command the number of Zerg who have ever fallen."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: *Turns to AI* Oh, sorry. I didn't see you come in. Now.. Let's see... It says here that you died in a freak voting accident. Care to elaborate?
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: *Turns to TUM* Oh, really? More psychic than all of your fallen cerebrates and overlords combined? And all of that dead tissue that surely lies within you.
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
"Dead tissue? I'd hardly consider dead tissue to be an "ally", that's a freaking part of me and doesn't count. But yeah, my psychic power is greater than that of the combined psychic of every single Cerebrate and Overlord ever, living AND dead. That's why I'M the leader of the Swarm." *More Psionic Storms* "Anyway, my body recycles brain cells, so they never truly die. They just get smarter and more powerful. Thus the reason I'm so huge."
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Robtcee13,Jan 31 2008
06:15 PM
Grim Reaper: *Turns to AI* Oh, sorry. I didn't see you come in. Now.. Let's see... It says here that you died in a freak voting accident. Care to elaborate?

Really? I thought I died of a cream puff deficiency. Or from walking into a topic. I can't remember.
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
Hay. Maltese. Stop lurking moar and post.
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master4sword
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Hail Hydreigon
Admin
The Ultramind12,Jan 31 2008
08:22 PM
Hay. Maltese. Stop lurking moar and post.

^This.


Also, the alt comment was outside of the quotes, it's not something I said >_>

"Surname? Wouldn't you like to know..."
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Ultramind, you have no idea how far you are from finishing your goal. Approximately at 0.01%, as you may guess. It's gonna take a bit more effort from you. Also, you'd be surprised at what dead brain tissue would do. Your body isn't here. Your soul is. Your body is back where you died at. Also, Atomic Infraino, or whatever you are, I have to say, I watched you die. It wasn't pretty. Can't you describe what happened?

(M4S)
Grim Reaper: Yes, I would. It helps me determine what I do to your soul. I could just look it up, but that would take 1038 minutes.
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Maltese
Member Avatar
Fire 1, fire 2, fire 1, fire 2....
With a melon?
...
I'm dead, aren't I.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
(Maltese)
Grim Reaper: Oh, hey Maltese. Finally got here, I see. So, what happened to you? Negabus get derailed or something?
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Maltese
Member Avatar
Fire 1, fire 2, fire 1, fire 2....
Negabus? Wha? (That's FALCON, dork.)
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Oh, right. I get you two confused all the time. So, how DID you die?
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Maltese
Member Avatar
Fire 1, fire 2, fire 1, fire 2....
Uh. Stuff happened. Yeah. PRIVATE STUFF. Not that it matters. Serenity will be around to pick me up any time now.
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
Robtcee13,Jan 31 2008
08:27 PM
Grim Reaper: Ultramind, you have no idea how far you are from finishing your goal. Approximately at 0.01%, as you may guess. It's gonna take a bit more effort from you. Also, you'd be surprised at what dead brain tissue would do. Your body isn't here. Your soul is. Your body is back where you died at.

"Huh. I could have sworn I didn't HAVE a soul. Speaking of which, I can't quite recall how I died... Oh, wait. That's right. This is one of those cycles." *Psionic Storm that slaughters everything on the field* "I 'die' for a bit, my body... does stuff which I'm not going to tell you about, and then I come back to life. Pity, I was having fun slaughtering these guys." *Psionic Storm that kills everything again* "Regardless, I'll be out of your hair in a few days at most."
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Well, let's see here.

It was a fine morning, and everyone was celebrating the long-awaited day of February 32nd. I was playing Advance Wars on my DS (which is made entirely of gold, silver, and credit cards) as I walked down a street, when all of a sudden, there were NINJAS! THOUSANDS OF THEM! And they weren't any ordinary ninjas either, they were FRENCH NINJAS! THOUSANDS OF THEM! Fortunately, they were very polite, and we played some poker and hopscotch while speedeating snails. Then out of nowhere, a cheese unicorn explodes out of a fire hydrant and starts spitting Yoshi eggs at me! Well, I did what any ordinary person would do: I yelled "YOU DARE BRING LIGHT INTO MY LAIR? YOU MUST DIE!!!" and shot lightning at it. The unicorn began to recite the Greek alphabet backwards in a chicken-like accent, and exploded in a shower of fire ants and tree-shaped laptops. I reveled in my glorious victory, and began eating a pie-flavored cockroach to celebrate. However, my victory party was cut short, as an abnormally large poll with elephant ears and a donkey's ass fell from the sky and created a very very large hole where I used to be.

Does that answer your question?
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper: Ah, I see, Atomic. Now let me see... *Checks list* Sweet! That means I get to keep your soul! *Turns to Ultramind* Now, for you... Cycle, eh? Well, not to burst your bubble, or your ego, but something prevents your soul from leaving here until your 3000 year probation is up. Mind you, your minions have a far worse punishment. *Turns to Maltese* Serenity? *Serenity descends from above* You mean the same Serenity who died in the same event you died in? Well, what are you both? Human? Death incarnate? Giant Brain?
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Oh. Okay then.
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master4sword
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Hail Hydreigon
Admin
"Look it up, then. It seems I've got time now."
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The Ultramind12
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Fist of the North Star
Atomic Inferno,Jan 31 2008
08:52 PM
Well, let's see here.

It was a fine morning, and everyone was celebrating the long-awaited day of February 32nd. I was playing Advance Wars on my DS (which is made entirely of gold, silver, and credit cards) as I walked down a street, when all of a sudden, there were NINJAS! THOUSANDS OF THEM! And they weren't any ordinary ninjas either, they were FRENCH NINJAS! THOUSANDS OF THEM! Fortunately, they were very polite, and we played some poker and hopscotch while speedeating snails. Then out of nowhere, a cheese unicorn explodes out of a fire hydrant and starts spitting Yoshi eggs at me! Well, I did what any ordinary person would do: I yelled "YOU DARE BRING LIGHT INTO MY LAIR? YOU MUST DIE!!!" and shot lightning at it. The unicorn began to recite the Greek alphabet backwards in a chicken-like accent, and exploded in a shower of fire ants and tree-shaped laptops. I reveled in my glorious victory, and began eating a pie-flavored cockroach to celebrate. However, my victory party was cut short, as an abnormally large poll with elephant ears and a donkey's ass fell from the sky and created a very very large hole where I used to be.

Does that answer your question?

Where does he THINK of these things?

You need to write books, AI. They would be as epic as, say, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Anyway...

"My minions? What's the point of punishing a bunch of mindless fleshbags that don't even feel pain? In any case, 3000 years ain't all that bad. My body has gone longer with me not connected to it. If you tell me that you don't have Brawl, or there' some stipulation to playing it, I WILL erase you."
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Maltese
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Fire 1, fire 2, fire 1, fire 2....
Serenity...die? Okay, I'd nlike to speak to the manager now, because you sir have NO idea what's going on.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper (AI): What, you don't care that your eternal soul is confined to hell? You don't care that you will be my bitch, forever and ever? Y--... Uh... I guess the only way to torture you is to send you to heaven after 3 years.

Grim Reaper (M4S): Swordmaster? Is that it?
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
The Ultramind12,Jan 31 2008
07:06 PM
You need to write books, AI. They would be as epic as, say, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

I've actually considered that at one point or another >________>
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Robtcee13,Jan 31 2008
07:10 PM
Grim Reaper (AI): What, you don't care that your eternal soul is confined to hell? You don't care that you will be my bitch, forever and ever? Y--... Uh... I guess the only way to torture you is to send you to heaven after 3 years.

All right.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper (TUM): Believe me, I want Brawl as much as you, but thanks to an influx of souls, it's impossible for it to get delivered until at least 10 years pass.

Grim Reaper (Maltese): I am the fuckin' manager. She died, and that's the only way she's here. This is a corner of the universe with so many defenses and it's so well hidden, not even God knows where it is.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper (AI): Is there NO bothering you?! Fine. You don't get to play Brawl!
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
Robtcee13,Jan 31 2008
07:13 PM
Grim Reaper (AI): Is there NO bothering you?! Fine. You don't get to play Brawl!

Okay.
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Robtcee13
I am a fish.
Grim Reaper (AI): Your indifference begins to enrage me, mortal!
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Atomic Inferno
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it's a midnight ride
Moderators
I'm sure it does.
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